


McCreme

by albinosilver



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-24
Updated: 2016-08-24
Packaged: 2018-08-10 19:47:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 633
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7858747
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/albinosilver/pseuds/albinosilver
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>McCree and Hanzo work at a diner</p><p>It's dumb</p><p>You've been warned</p>
            </blockquote>





	McCreme

Hanzo handed a cup of coffee over to a waiting customer, who stared past him with a look of disgust. He followed the gaze and turned around just in time to see McCree stuffing his face with a poorly constructed burger in the back room.

"McCree, stop eating those." Hanzo demanded.

The burger was a patty with a single bottom bun folded over it, coated in a very generous serving of ketchup. The abomination was dripping with grease and McCree used the corner of his serape to soak up the dribble down his chin.

"But this one fell on the floor, couldn't just let it go to waste." McCree said through a mouthful while continuing to flip other patties on the grill. 

Business in this place was already slow and McCree certainly wasn't doing it any favours. Hanzo sighed.

"You go serve customers and I will cook." 

"You got it!" McCree was onto him instantly with open arms.

It was too late to run now. Hanzo backed up as far as the counter would allow, awaiting his inevitable fate. He cringed as the greasy hands smeared across his back and felt that he needed a shower just to continue on living.

"Please make yourself more presentable first."

McCree flashed him a wink and disappeared on the stairs with a jingle of spurs.

The spatula he'd been using was left balancing dangerously off the side of the grill and it fell to the floor with a clatter before Hanzo could reach it. 

\---

McCree reappeared in a spiffy yellow vest, with yellow slacks, a yellow fedora and a white collared shirt underneath. His hair was well groomed and a swanky 'stache was all that was left in the place of his beard.

"It's my extra charming outfit." He gestured to himself with finger guns. "For the fans."

 _At least it's clean._ Hanzo handed him a stack of menus and sent him on his way. 

In McCree's absence, Hanzo was able to mop the floors, clean the counters and finish the remaining orders. Once everything was done, he decided it was time to check up on McCree's progress. His only task was to give out menus. _He couldn't possibly mess that up._

At first glance, McCree was nowhere to be seen. It was only his bright yellow cape dangling from one of the dining booths that gave him away. To Hanzo's horror, the booth was already occupied. A young couple was trying to have lunch at the table and McCree was fast asleep on the bench with his legs sprawled over one of them.

"He came out of nowhere trying to sell us a _McCreme_ , ate our fries and then fell asleep." The man complained.

Hanzo's face was flushed from second hand embarrassment. "I apologize. Is there anything I can-"

"No, we're leaving." The man threw McCree's legs off his lap and stepped over him to get out. 

"Rest in peace." McCree awoke and continued eating the fries on the table. "Thought they were liking my company."

Hanzo watched through the window as the couple's car disappeared in the distance. He sighed deeply and flipped the hanging "open" sign to "closed".

"Closing already?" McCree straightened up in the booth, noticing Hanzo's somber expression. "Aw darlin', I'm sorry."

McCree got to his feet and snatched a bowl off the counter before going off into the back room. He returned with a messy spiral of vanilla and chocolate ice cream, sprinkled in banana chips.

"A McCreme just for you." He tipped his hat.

Hanzo couldn't help but smile.

The two sat down at the booth together and shared the McCreme. Hanzo ate with a spoon like a sophisticated person while McCree used the remaining fries to scoop up ice cream.

It was just another day on the job.

**Author's Note:**

> My phone kept autocorrecting McCree to meme so that led to the creation of "McCreme"
> 
> Yes I'm trash 
> 
> Anyway then I realized that sounded like some Macdonald's dessert


End file.
